The Scene: Lily, an ex coworker and dear friend of mine has trekked all the way down from the Upper East Side to my cozy, little one bedroom in Brooklyn. The Indian food has arrived and the edibles have just kicked in. Life is good. As we sip our mango lasses and mess around with the jigsaw puzzle I purchased earlier in the week, I dive right in.
Jules: So tell me about your experience with cam sites.
Lily: I started camming after I had done sugar babying and I never got super into it. Sometimes it can be fun but most of the time, at least when I was really trying to use it to get followers, it was a pain in the ass. I’d have to set up photoshoots and create content constantly. I have had more fun and made more money making sex tapes and selling those versus the whole daily post thing. Right now I basically just sell private content to people who already follow me. Overall I’m not a huge fan of cam sites. They take a significant amount of money, like 20%
Jules: Wow that’s crazy!
Lily: Yeah but I mean sometimes I just have them Venmo me directly for access to content.
Jules: Cool…so you use it as a networking platform?
Lily: Ya except people have to come to you first in order for you to be able to network with them. Mostly I just have people who I know through sugaring or wherever follow me.
Jules: So when did you first get into camming?
Lily: During lockdown. I was taking a break from school andI living with this guy, Gerry, who told me about OnlyFans. I had heard of it before but had never thought about doing it. Gerry bought me all my cam gear and I started using my Instagram to attract camming clients.
Jules: Did you find it to be lucrative?
Lily: Not at all. I think the most I ever made in one month was $350, and that’s when I was actually trying to promote myself. When I had that grind mindset, shit was not fun.
Jules: So are you still camming these days?
Lily: I am but I’ve ditched the grind mindset. I do it now purely for the enjoyment of posting, not because I’m desperate for cash. So that’s been a nice change. Also, I’ve stopped trying to tailor my videos to what I think people want and just do me instead. If people are gonna follow me for me cool, otherwise fuck ‘em.
Jules: Do you find yourself making genuine connections with the people you meet online?
Lily: To a certain extent – I mean you don’t really have one-on-one conversations with the majority of people who exist on the internet. A lot of guys on there are really just looking for a human interaction. Everyone has got their quirks and shit. So it does feel personal but there’s definitely a limit to that connection.We’re probably never going to go get lunch together, ya know?
Jules: So you’ve never met a sugar daddy through a camming site?
Lily: No, it’s always the other way around. As in, I meet the sugar daddy and direct him to my account. Then he’ll follow me there. Even when I’m upfront about never posting, he will usually still buy a year long subscription, on top of Venmoing me $50 per video.
Jules: $50…not bad. I have an album of videos and photos I’m giving away for free. I should start charging!
Lily: Yes, you should!
Jules: So basically you use camming sites as a platform for you to store content, which you then distribute to people at your discretion?
Lily: Yup. The only annoying thing is that the withdrawal process takes like 6 days and there’s a $20 withdrawal minimum. So I try to have people Venmo me directly whenever possible.
Jules: Are you on multiple sites?
Lily: OnlyFans is the main one. I recently signed up for NSFW and Mygirlfund but it’s been weeks and neither one has finished processing my application.
Jules: What! That’s crazy. Does that veil of exclusivity make you more intrigued or does it make you say “fuck you guys?”
Lily: I’m definitely like “fuck you guys.” Overall, camming has high key sucked for me compared to sugaring.
Jules: That makes sense. For someone who isn’t trying to do in-person meetups or who doesn’t want to have sex, camming seems more enticing. There’s clear boundaries and it’s a lot less risky physically. I can see the appeal. But if you’re willing to do in-person meets, putting in all the time and energy to create consistent content doesn’t seem worth it.
Lily: Totally! I see the draw for some. And there’s obviously the girls who have huge followings and can charge crazy amounts of money for in-person meetups. But they are the exception.
Jules: Is there any way to tell what guys have money on a camming site?
Lily: Kind of. There’s a tiered system where a certain color corresponds to a certain amount of money in his account, which he uses to tip me. When there’s a lot of coins in the account, it’s a signal to me that I should spend more time engaging by responding to his messages and offering to share private content.
Jules: So can someone just intentionally load up on coins to make it look like they are going to spend money on you and then just waste your time?
Lily: Ya, it happens from time to time. But you learn how to filter out the bullshit.
Jules: What other bullshit is there?
Lily: A lot of creepy vibes…like even more so than sugar daddy websites. One time I was live camming and I took a sip of water from a water bottle and some guy told me to “put the bottle up your pussy,” and I was like “Ew, fuck you dude.”
Jules: I feel like with the internet there’s just so much anonymity that people will say and do shit they would never say and do in real life. With sugar daddy websites, of course people can lie and hide parts of themselves – most people do – but there’s still some kind of accountability there. More so than camming sites. There’s this “I’m putting myself out there, you’re putting yourself out there” vibe that makes it feel more genuine, with less of a tolerance for inappropriate behavior.
Lily: For sure…the guys on sugar daddy websites are actually trying to meet up and are therefore incentivized to act normal enough to land an in-person meetup. Versus the incel in his mom’s basement who is trolling me on a cam site. That guy has nothing to lose from saying weird shit. What’s the worst that’s going to happen…I’ll block him?
Jules: So tell me about your ideal cam site. What would it look like and how would it be different than what’s currently out there?
Lily: Well the fee paid to them would be way lower than 20%. But most importantly, I would want there to be a mixed payment option.
Jules: What do you mean by that?
Lily: Crypto. It’s instantaneous which I like. And I met this guy on a sugar daddy website who’s been teaching me about crypto. He’s given me some Ethereum. I don’t know much but I find it interesting. It’s literally like gambling.
Jules: Ya, I’m in the same boat. I dabble but am still pretty clueless. I do see the draw of using a decentralized payment system for sex work stuff. Seems more low key.
Lily: Definitely but it could also be total bullshit. No one really knows. I guess we’ll find out.
Jules: I know who I’ll be getting all my trickle down crypto knowledge from now on 🙂
Jules
Based in Brooklyn, Jules has dedicated her twenties towards harnessing her pussy power, exploring the muse, whore, and wild woman archetypes along the way. When not blogging, you can find her sweating the toxins out in a hot yoga class or sipping a matcha latte at a pretentious coffee shop, whilst she scribbles away in her journal.
