“When was the last time you received without feeling you had to give something back?”
That question stayed with me long after leaving Salon des Plaisirs in Berlin, an immersive space created by Cleo, the Tantric Muse, where female pleasure takes centre stage and a carefully curated group of men dedicate an entire afternoon to one thing only: giving.
Before stepping into the space, I noticed myself carrying mixed feelings.
As a woman, I realised that for many years my pleasure often felt secondary.
Before discovering Berlin’s conscious, sensual and sex-positive community, many of my intimate experiences followed a familiar script. If I experienced pleasure, wonderful. If I didn’t, it rarely seemed to matter that much. My partners almost always experienced pleasure, often orgasm, while mine sometimes felt optional.
So when Cleo told me about her vision of placing women’s pleasure at the centre and inviting men into the role of simply giving, I was intrigued, excited and also… a little sceptical.
Part of me wondered whether reversing the roles was really the answer. Was this creating another form of entitlement… this time for women? Or was there something deeper being explored?
Entering a Temple of Pleasure
The moment I entered, those questions softened.
Every detail had been prepared with extraordinary care. The flowers, the food, the scents, the decoration, the music… nothing felt accidental. It felt like a temple devoted to pleasure in all its forms.
Before the exploration even began, Cleo welcomed us with words that deeply moved me.
She shared that her relationship with men has been complex. Like many women, she has experienced betrayal, abuse and deep wounds.
Yet instead of concluding that men are the problem, she chose another path.
“I believe every single human has a good heart. It can be veiled, but it’s there. Where we put our focus, energy expands. So why not put our energy into expanding connection rather than hatred?”
There was something profoundly hopeful about creating a space that wasn’t about blaming anyone, but about consciously cultivating another possibility.
A Labyrinth of Curiosities
The diversity of the offerings was extraordinary. There was Man Handling, where two men invited women to simply be held, guided and cared for through sensual movement.
Tantra Massage practitioners offered oil massage and conscious and caring touch. One man devoted two full hours to an incredibly slow vulva devotional practice.
There were Shibari artists, impact play practitioners, sensation play, theatrical experiences, and even a devotional foot ritual where four men lovingly washed and massaged women’s feet with remarkable presence.
One of the most original offerings was Olivier’s Human Wine Pairing.
Each participant was paired with a wine through scent. You were first invited to smell a person’s body before tasting the wine that echoed their unique fragrance.
It was playful, sensual and surprisingly poetic.
Some men facilitated dedicated stations, while others simply wandered through the space as attentive stewards, offering tea, food, conversation or practical support whenever needed.
What moved me most was witnessing how much joy many of them genuinely found in giving generously without performing but simply serving.
The Beauty of Receiving
As for my own journey through the Salon des Plaisirs, I naturally slipped into the role of an observer.
Rather than trying everything, I found myself wandering slowly through the space, watching women laugh, sigh, cry, melt, breathe and simply receive.
My Human Wine Pairing became one of the highlights of the evening.
Olivier slowly explored my scent before pairing me with a beautiful white Bordeaux that somehow reflected my own fragrance. Afterwards I found myself smelling the women around me and discovering how unique everybody smelled.
It became a celebration of our diversity in the most unexpected way. I also received a deeply devotional foot massage.
Sitting on the balcony, feeling gentle hands caring for my feet while watching women around me melt into massage, Man Handling sessions and moments of profound intimacy, I realised how rarely I witness women simply allowing themselves to receive.
I also explored sensation play, allowing myself to become curious about touch rather than outcome. Instead of inquiring, “Where is this leading?” my only question was “What am I feeling right now?”. It was a surprisingly different experience of intimacy.
A New Benchmark
Throughout the afternoon, another unexpected feeling emerged: sisterhood.
Women gently encouraged one another to be brave, to explore, to say yes, to say no, to witness one another’s pleasure without comparison or competition.
There was something profoundly healing about seeing women enjoy themselves without apology.
I realised how much shame many of us still carry around prioritising our own pleasure, how easily receiving can trigger guilt and how often we feel we must earn care.
Salon des Plaisirs invited another possibility: receiving without guilt not need to perform but simply because we are worthy of it.
At the same time, I also found myself thinking that a space like this could just as beautifully exist for men.
They, too, often carry the role of giving and may rarely experience what it feels like to completely surrender into receiving.
And yet, what I loved most about this experience was precisely its polarity.
Not because one deserves more than the other, but because fully inhabiting either role teaches us something about ourselves and I believe everyone deserves to experience both.
Because when we are truly allowed to receive without guilt, without performance and without feeling we owe something in return, we discover a completely different quality of intimacy.
I left with a new benchmark for what intimacy can look like, rooted around presence, generosity and trust. More than anything, I left deeply grateful that spaces like this exist.
And hopeful that more spaces devoted to conscious pleasure, genuine connection and the transforming power of receiving continue to emerge.
A space to indulge, receive and expand
"When pleasure becomes a true art form"