If you haven’t stepped into the world of sex parties yet, consider this your invitation. New York is home to some of the most creative and beautifully curated spaces for connection, exploration and shared desire. These are the ones worth knowing about.

Queer Sex Parties: The Wink

The Wink Sex Parties

The Wink describes itself as “a members-only club for colourful queers,” led by a queer-centred, BIPOC-led team. Their focus is on building a real, respectful community rather than surface-level inclusivity – a place where queer people can meet, explore and express themselves.

Their events are imaginative and atmospheric, with past themes ranging from psychedelic garden parties to dreamy, cloud-like worlds. You’ll find a mix of sensuality, creativity and connection, held with clear boundaries and community care. Membership is free but requires an application to help keep the space balanced and safe.

What to expect

•  LGBTQ+ community: A queer-centred, inclusive and community-driven environment.

• Clear, explicit consent rules: Every touch, kiss or interaction must be verbally negotiated.

• Safe Atmosphere: Guardians on site to support safety, comfort and communication.

• Dress code: Themed dress encouraged; individuality always welcomed.

• Pricing: Tickets typically range from US $30 to US $80, depending on the event.

BDSM Sex Parties: Société Anonyme

Société Anonyme Sex Parties

Société Anonyme is a members-only kink collective that blends BDSM and artsy energy into one immersive nightlife experience. Their events feel underground, creative and intentionally subversive, attracting people who want something more atmospheric than a straightforward play party.

The focus is on building a safe, sex positive community rooted in expression and artistic experimentation. Membership is required and applicants are vetted to maintain the integrity and safety of the space.

What to expect

• Atmosphere: Artistic counter-culture vibes with immersive performances, kink play zones, visual installations and a moody, hedonistic aesthetic.

• Consent culture: All interactions require explicit verbal consent. Safewords and clear boundaries are central, with guardians present to support comfort and safety.

• Inclusivity: Open to all identities, orientations and experience levels, from the curious to the deeply experienced.

• Dress code: Think fetish wear, creative black looks or high-impact outfits. Casual clothing is not permitted.

• Flexibility: Attend solo or with a partner or friends. You choose whether to watch, socialise or play at your own pace.

• Location: Events are held at changing private venues around Brooklyn. Exact locations are shared only with confirmed members.

• Pricing: Prices typically range from $95 to $130, depending on tiered ticket releasing and events.

Poly and Kink Sex Parties: Hit Me Up

Hit Me Up Sex Parties.

Hit Me Up is a curated community for polyamorous, kinky and ENM-minded New Yorkers. What began as small gatherings among friends has evolved into one of the city’s most energetic and friendly kink collectives.

They now run mixers, workshops, play parties and community events from their dedicated venue in Lower Manhattan, while also partnering with venues like House of Yes, Red Pavilion, Our Wicked Lady and Torture Garden for larger nights.

Their guiding principle is simple: poly and kink should be fun. Safety and respect are core values, but the vibe is intentionally warm, weird, playful and social. Membership is selective enough to keep the environment safe and balanced, yet welcoming to people who genuinely want to be part of the community.

What to expect

• Atmosphere: Friendly, weird, accessible kink parties with a playful ENM and poly crowd. Expect a mix of social energy, dungeon play, themed nights and creative self expression.

• Consent culture: Rules are strictly enforced. Dress codes are respected. Aggressive or boundary-crossing behaviour results in immediate action. Their consent policy is actually upheld in practice.

• Inclusivity: A welcoming space for queer, kink and poly communities. Events are designed to be safer, friendlier and more breathable than oversold nightlife parties.

• Flexibility: You can attend solo, with a partner or with friends. There is always space to step away, reset or explore at your own pace.

• Programming: A mix of classes, workshops, mixers and full play parties. They offer both beginner-friendly education and more advanced kink spaces.

• Location: Events take place at their dedicated venue in Lower Manhattan, with additional partnered events across NYC.

• Pricing: Pricing varies by event, typically within an accessible mid-range, depending on the type of workshop or party.

Latex Fetish Parties: Gloss NYC

The Gloss NYC Sex Parties.

Gloss is a latex-focused, consent-driven community building the vibrant rubber scene New York once had. Founded in 2022 by long-time rubberists and kink organisers, Gloss exists to reignite the city’s fetish culture with intentionality, creativity and care. Their events centre latex fashion, rubber play and a warm, tight-knit community atmosphere, offering everything from mixers to full play parties.

The vibe is friendly, shiny and expressive. Gloss events attract people who genuinely love latex, from newcomers discovering the material for the first time to experienced rubberists looking for a home base. Membership for play parties is vetted, ensuring that the space remains respectful, safe, inclusive and fully aligned with their community values.

What to expect

• Atmosphere: Latex-centred, fashion-driven parties with a playful, queer rubberist crowd. Expect shiny looks, expressive outfits and a focus on community over spectacle.

• Consent culture: Gloss enforces a strict ask-first model with trained Guardians on site. Boundaries are taken seriously and reports are acted on. Safety comes before everything else.

• Inclusivity: A community for all responsible fetishists. They specifically aim to support trans attendees, BIPOC rubberists and anyone facing financial barriers through discounted tickets.

• Dress code: Events are rubber-focused. Latex is encouraged, and for play parties often required. Creativity, shine and commitment to the aesthetic are part of the culture.

• Flexibility: Public events are open to everyone. Private play parties require vetting and a sponsor, helping maintain a respectful and balanced space.

• Location: Events take place at Gloss’s dedicated venue in Lower Manhattan, with occasional collaborations across NYC.

• Pricing: Pricing varies by event, with discounted tickets available for BIPOC and SW community members.

Exclusive Sex Parties: SNCTM

Snctm Sex Parties

Snctm has been said to hold the world’s most exclusive members-only sex parties. Everybody has to apply before being accepted (or not), which includes providing photos and answering questions about sexual turn ons. If a single man is accepted, the minimum membership fee he will pay annually is $12,500, however as the website states: ‘Snctm is always supportive of elegant and intriguing women’ and so if they are accepted onto the ‘women’s list’ they don’t need to pay a dime (woop).

Past events have included luxury dinners, fetish classes and pool parties, but the most famous event is the black tie masquerade ball. It’s hot in an ultra-rich getting ultra-dirty, Eyes Wide Shut, exclusive sort of way. There are also performers at the events, making it a sexy whirlwind extravaganza, but less so a raw and authentic get-together of classified freaks.

Location: Secret, nondescript buildings, likely in Manhattan.
Dress code: Formal black tie (but the women can get away with lingerie only).
Price: $$$$

Techno Dance Sex Parties: BOUND

Bound Sex Parties

Since starting out in 2016, Bound sex parties have gained a big following also as a record label, radio show, lifestyle platform and even a clothing brand. Not only that but they created the Global Fetishwear Guide.  According to their site, Bound ‘aims to create experiences that place emphasis on sonic encounters and visual stimuli.’

Bound is a resident at the gritty Queen’s nightclub, Basement nyc, and so here, the sex parties are just as much about the music as they are about the bdsm play. There are plenty of known techno djs playing at events, and ‘the dance floor is for dancing, not conversation’. If you’re looking for a hardcore night of industrial music and respectful bdsm play, these are the sex parties for you.

Location: Basement nyc, Queens.
Dress code: Strictly fetish attire.
Price: $

Community Sex Parties: Hacienda

Hacienda sex parties

Hacienda is a sex positive community at the heart of New York’s alternative nightlife. Their focus is on consent, communication and community care, offering everything from play parties to social gatherings, workshops and ongoing sex education.

Hacienda welcomes people of all genders, bodies and orientations. Events often include playful themes, performances, social spaces and opportunities for exploration in an environment that feels relaxed, friendly and unpretentious.

Membership works through a referral system. You need a referral from an existing member, or you can apply with a partner or friend. Once accepted, you gain access to private events and can invite trusted guests of your own.

What to expect

• Fun vibes: Fun, unserious energy with pool parties, glitter, playful themes and a warm, party-at-home atmosphere.

• Event style: A mix of party types, from larger play events to smaller workshops and community gatherings.

• Pressure free play: You can attend solo, with a partner or with friends, with no expectation to participate beyond what feels comfortable.

• Drinks and food: Many events are BYOB, with snacks or meals available depending on the night.

• Location: Most parties take place at a secret Brooklyn venue with a warm, homey, townhouse style feel.

• Pricing: Membership is about US $40 for three months or US $120 for a year. Private party tickets are usually US $45 to US $85.

Male only sex parties: Lodge

Lodge Sex Parties

Lodge holds sex parties in nyc for gay and bisexual men only. Their blue painted website, with muscly men holding up the Lodge letters, and fantastic event names like ‘Bear Party’, ‘Blow Buddies’ and ‘Workman’s Lunch’ displays their tongue-in-cheek celebration of stereotypical masculinity. ‘Workman’s Lunch’ is an event dedicated to quickies for people on their lunch break in the city. ‘The Chub Chaser Party’ is specifically for plus-size men to let it all hang loose.

In a typical manly man way, Lodge don’t beat around the bush their sex parties are literally about ‘facilitating fun and satisfying sexual encounters for gay and bisexual men.’ and they try to remain as apolitical as is possible. All of their events are open door, so this is anything but exclusive.

It’s about meeting gays from all over- not just New Yorkers, but visitors from far and wide. Lodge pride themselves on being totally anonymous and there is no membership fee- all you have to do is sign up to the mailing list to find out about sex parties. There are events almost every night of each week, so there’s plenty to go around!

Location: Various locations around nyc.
Dress code: Underwear or less.
Price: $

Social Mixers: Space Invader Social

The Space Invader Social events.

Space Invader Social is not a sex party. It is a casual, playful mixer for people who want to meet the community without stepping straight into the world of play parties. It is perfect if you’re curious, ENM or poly-leaning, or simply looking for a chill, low-pressure space where connection comes first.

Led by a queer femme team of artists and producers, Space Invader transforms NYC venues into vibrant, retro, immersive environments. Their signature PG-13 mixer, Fresh Meet, blends cocktails, throwback grooves, connection games and light performance to help people meet one another in a fun, social way.

What to expect

• Atmosphere: Playful, bizarre and immersive vibes inspired by Studio 54 meets Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. High energy, zero pressure.

• Crowd: Open to all humans, couples, singles, throuples and curious newcomers across all genders and orientations.

• Support: Friendly Guardians with glowing armbands are on site for support, questions or social ease.

• Dress code: Themes vary. Dressing up is encouraged but optional.

• Format: A social-first mixer with no sexual activity. Designed to bridge the gap between online chatting, dating apps and the wider kink or ENM scene.

• Location: Rotating NYC venues transformed into unique social playgrounds.

• Pricing: Tiered by release timing. All tickets offer the same experience, with financial hardship options available.

Beyond Sex Parties: Where to Find Curated Sensual Events in NYC

Sex parties aren’t the only way to explore intimacy, desire and connection in this city. New York is full of beautifully curated experiences that sit between social, sensual and creative. Here are some of our favourite alternative sensual experiences you can currently find in NYC:

Shibari Lesson with Salem the Sadist

A private rope session for individuals or couples, tailored to your level and interests. Salem teaches everything from foundational shibari to intermediate patterns, uplines, partials and static suspensions, offering a calm, attentive space to learn and explore. This is a guided sensual experience, not a performance, and is shaped entirely around your pace and comfort.

• Format: In-person lesson

• Location: NYC

• Rate: $100–$150 per hour (studio or rental space)

• Provider: Salem the Sadist, NYC’s Shibari Siren

Perfect if you’re curious about rope, want to learn the fundamentals with a skilled practitioner or want to explore shibari with a partner in a safe, supportive setting.

Find out more

Sensual Touch Therapy with Kat

A soothing, sensory-focused touch session designed to help you slow down, soften and reconnect with your body. Using gentle techniques and essential oils, Kat creates a calming environment where tension can melt and clarity can return. This is a therapeutic, sensual experience centred on relaxation, presence and care.

• Format: 60-minute in-person session

• Location: New York City

• Rate: $200

• Provider: Kat K, sensual touch therapist serving NYC and nearby areas

Ideal if you want a restorative, grounding experience that awakens the senses without the intensity of a play-party environment.

Find out more

The Submissive Experience with Mistress Seren

A focused, two-hour initiation into the world of structured domination. Mistress Seren guides you out of your thoughts and into full embodied surrender, offering a controlled, precise and immersive introduction to power exchange. This session is crafted for those ready to explore submission with intention, clarity and expert guidance.

• Format: 2-hour in-person session

• Location: New York City

• Rate: $1800

• Provider: Mistress Seren, BDSM practitioner, coach and educator

Best suited for those seeking a high-intensity, professional D/s experience with a practitioner who leads with depth, expertise and unwavering command.

Find out more

Online Sensual Experiences

As well an sex parties, temple night and in-person events, you can also explore a wide range of online sensual experiences on Sensuali. From erotic writing workshops and sensuality talks to guided erotic audio, online striptease lessons, couples workbooks and more, these offerings are curated by top practitioners from around the world.

This is your place to discover experiences both big and small, whether you’re exploring alone or with a partner.

See all online sensual experiences

Iso

Author

Iso is a writer and filmmaker based in East London. She is passionate about all things erotic and leads a sexy, shame-free life in hope that she can inspire others to do the same. Originally from a Northern seaside town, she is naturally drawn to the best things in life: candyfloss, trashy karaoke bars and heart-shaped sunglasses.