The ultimate guide to NYC’s sex parties

If you haven’t stepped into the world of sex parties yet, consider this your invitation. New York is home to some of the most creative and beautifully curated spaces for connection, exploration and shared desire. These are the ones worth knowing about.

Sex clubs in NYC vs sex parties: what’s the difference?

If you’re new to the scene, you might be wondering what separates a sex club from a sex party. Sex clubs generally have a regular venue where people gather to socialise and explore sexually. Sex parties are organised events, often with curated guest lists, tickets or membership requirements.

There’s plenty of crossover. Many of NYC’s best-known sex-positive organisations operate as communities rather than traditional clubs, even when they have permanent venues. Below, we explore NYC’s sex parties and the communities behind them, from underground BDSM nights and women-only gatherings to luxury play parties and casual socials.

BDSM sex parties: Société Anonyme

Société Anonyme is a members-only kink collective combining BDSM, art and underground nightlife. Their immersive parties bring together performances, installations and kink play, attracting a creative, sex-positive crowd.

Membership requires an application and vetting process, with an emphasis on consent, self-expression and community.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Underground, artistic and hedonistic, with performances, installations and dedicated play spaces.
Who can attend: All identities, orientations and experience levels. Solo guests, couples and groups are welcome.
Dress code: Fetishwear, creative black outfits or statement looks. No casual clothing.
Flexibility: Watch, socialise or participate at your own pace.
Location: Changing private venues across Brooklyn, shared with confirmed members.
Pricing: Typically $95–$130, depending on the event and ticket tier.

5 ways to explore BDSM in NYC.

Queer techno sex parties: BOUND

BOUND is a queer techno and fetish party series combining underground electronic music with BDSM culture. Founded in 2016, it has grown into a record label, mix series and lifestyle platform celebrating fetish aesthetics and queer expression.

Music is central to the experience, with industrial techno, dark dance floors and kink play creating an intense, immersive atmosphere.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Industrial, queer and fetish-forward, with a strong focus on music and dancing.
Who can attend: A queer-centred space attracting LGBTQ+ and kink-aware crowds.
Music: Underground techno from established DJs.
Location: Primarily Basement NYC in Queens, with occasional events elsewhere.
Dress code: Strict fetishwear. Creativity and commitment to the look are expected.
Pricing: Varies by event, with tickets released in advance

Penthouse suite sex parties: Top Floor Club

Latex fetish parties: Gloss Group NYC

Gloss Group NYC is a latex-focused kink community founded in 2022 to revive New York’s rubber scene. Their events range from casual mixers to private play parties, bringing together newcomers and experienced rubber enthusiasts.

The atmosphere is friendly, expressive and community-focused. Play parties require vetting and a sponsor, while their public Shiny Cocktail Hours offer a more accessible introduction.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Playful, queer and latex-centred, with an emphasis on fashion and community.
Who can attend: Fetish enthusiasts of all experience levels, with an emphasis on inclusivity.
Dress code: Latex is encouraged and often required at play parties.
Entry requirements: Public mixers are open to all; private parties require vetting and a sponsor.
Location: A dedicated venue in Lower Manhattan, with occasional events elsewhere.
Pricing: Varies by event, with discounts available for BIPOC and sex worker community members.

Explore fetish experiences NYC

Poly and kink sex parties: Hit Me Up

Hit Me Up is a sex-positive community for polyamorous, kinky and ethically non-monogamous New Yorkers. What started as gatherings among friends has grown into a lively collective hosting mixers, workshops and play parties.

With a dedicated venue in Lower Manhattan and collaborations with larger nightlife spaces, their events combine kink education, socialising and play. The atmosphere is welcoming, creative and refreshingly unpretentious.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Playful, friendly and community-focused, with themed parties and dungeon spaces.
Who can attend: Queer, kink and poly communities, including newcomers.
Flexibility: Attend solo, with a partner or friends, and participate at your own pace.
Programming: Mixers, workshops, educational classes and play parties.
Location: Lower Manhattan, with additional events at venues across NYC.
Pricing: Varies by event, with options across different price points.

Luxury sex parties: SNCTM

Founded in Beverly Hills and now based in New York, SNCTM is an exclusive members’ club hosting luxury erotic events in New York and internationally. Its black-tie masquerades, intimate dinners and theatrical performances offer a glamorous, secret-society atmosphere.

Membership is selective, with applicants required to submit personal information and photos. Single men need an annual Aurum membership to attend, while women accepted onto the Sirens list may attend complimentary.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Glamorous and theatrical, with masked guests, erotic performances and an Eyes Wide Shut aesthetic.
Who can attend: Approved members and invited guests, subject to entry requirements.
Format: Masquerades, private dinners, erotic art classes and exclusive VIP experiences.
Dress code: Tuxedos for men, elegant eveningwear or lingerie for women. Masks required on entry.
Location: Private venues in NYC and other international cities, disclosed to attendees.
Pricing: Aurum membership starts at $12,500 annually; Dominus membership costs $35,000 annually. Event tickets vary.

Community sex parties: Hacienda

Hacienda has been part of NYC’s sex-positive scene since 2009, hosting play parties, workshops and social gatherings. Known for its relaxed, unpretentious atmosphere, events feel more like lively house parties than exclusive clubs.

Expect playful themes, performances, food and drinks, with no pressure to participate. Membership is referral-based, helping maintain a close-knit community.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Relaxed, playful and welcoming, with a house-party feel.
Who can attend: People of all genders and orientations, attending solo or with others.
Entry requirements: A referral from an existing member or an application with a partner or friend.
Event variety: Play parties, themed socials, workshops and educational gatherings.
Location: Primarily a private venue in Brooklyn, with the address shared with attendees.
Pricing: Approximately $40 for three months or $120 annually for membership. Party tickets typically cost $45–$85.

Explore more NYC kink experiences 

Women-only sex parties: Skirt Club NYC

Skirt Club is a private members’ community hosting women-only sex parties and social events in NYC and internationally. Created for women curious about exploring attraction to other women, it welcomes both newcomers and experienced guests.

Events range from cocktail evenings and burlesque performances to intimate play parties. The atmosphere is glamorous and discreet, with no pressure to participate.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Glamorous, feminine and flirtatious, with cocktails, lingerie and burlesque.
Who can attend: Women, including lesbian, bisexual and curious guests.
Event variety: Play parties, cocktail socials, workshops and events for women over 40.
Membership: Play parties are members-only, while some socials welcome prospective members.
Dress code: Glamorous eveningwear, lingerie or themed outfits, depending on the event.
Location: Private venues across Manhattan.
Pricing: Varies by event. Some cocktail socials start around $25–$30, with play parties priced separately.

Male-only sex parties: Lodge

Lodge hosts regular sex parties for gay, bisexual and curious men in NYC, with no membership, vetting or advance booking required. Events run throughout the week, offering a straightforward, accessible alternative to more exclusive clubs.

Parties cater to different interests, from casual daytime encounters and oral-only gatherings to bear nights, daddy-and-lad events and kink-focused sessions.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Relaxed, direct and sex-positive, with an emphasis on discretion and consent.
Who can attend: Men of all body types, backgrounds and adult ages, including visitors to NYC.
Event variety: The Bear Party, Blow Buddies, Chub Chaser parties, Dads ’n’ Lads and more.
Entry requirements: No membership, vetting or RSVP. Join the mailing list for updates.
Dress code: Underwear or less.
Location: Various private venues across NYC.
Pricing: Cash only, paid at the door.

Theatrical pansexual sex parties: House of Scorpio

House of Scorpio is a pansexual, sex-positive community hosting themed parties and events in Brooklyn. Their programme ranges from casual mixers and kink workshops to kissing parties and full play parties.

With a playful, theatrical atmosphere, events cater to different levels of curiosity, whether you’re looking to socialise, learn or explore more intimately.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Creative and playful, with music, costumes and themed events.
Who can attend: People of all genders and orientations, with a pansexual focus.
Event variety: Mixers, kissing parties, fetish nights, workshops and play parties.
Membership: Social events generally welcome non-members; play parties have additional requirements.
Dress code: Varies by event, often encouraging costumes, lingerie or fetishwear.
Location: Gemini & Scorpio Loft, Gowanus, Brooklyn.
Pricing: Varies by event and membership tier.

Social mixers: Space Invader Social

Space Invader Social offers playful, sex-positive mixers for people looking to meet NYC’s kink, poly and ENM communities without attending a play party.

Run by a queer femme team of artists and producers, their signature PG-13 event, Fresh Meet, brings together music, cocktails, connection games and performances in colourful, retro-inspired settings. There’s no sexual activity, just a relaxed space to meet people.

What to expect

Atmosphere: Colourful, quirky and playful, with retro music and immersive decor.
Who can attend: Singles, couples, throuples and curious newcomers of all genders and orientations.
Support: Designated Guardians are available to answer questions and help guests feel comfortable.
Dress code: Themed outfits are encouraged but optional.
Format: Social mixers with no sexual activity.
Location: Rotating venues across NYC.
Pricing: Tiered tickets, with financial hardship options available.

Sensual events, workshops, socials & more in NYC

Sensuali brings together sex-positive events, workshops and experiences across NYC, from kink socials and shibari lessons to sensual massage, pole dancing and erotic art.

Explore experiences for couples, women, men, LGBTQ+ communities and beginners, with options for different interests and comfort levels. You can also discover online and in-person experiences hosted by practitioners around the world.

See all online experiences →

See more BDSM experiences in NYC

You can also find private sex-positive immersive experiences in NYC that offer a more intimate way to explore your desires with expert practitioners. Here are three of our favourites:

Shibari lesson with Salem the Sadist

A private rope lesson for individuals or couples, covering everything from shibari basics to more advanced ties and suspensions. Sessions are tailored to your experience, interests and comfort level.

Format: In-person lesson
Location: NYC
Rate: $100–$150 per hour
Practitioner: Salem the Sadist

Ideal for beginners or couples looking to explore rope together.

Find out more

The submissive experience with Mistress Seren

A two-hour private session exploring submission and power exchange under Mistress Seren’s guidance. An immersive experience for those curious about structured domination.

Format: 2-hour in-person session
Location: NYC
Rate: $1,800
Practitioner: Mistress Seren

Best suited to those seeking an intensive, professionally guided D/s experience.

Find out more

Etiquette and consent

Consent is central to NYC’s sex-party scene. Every event has its own rules, but a few principles apply almost everywhere.

Always ask before touching someone or joining a scene. Nudity, flirting or watching others play doesn’t imply consent, and anyone can change their mind at any time.

Respect people’s privacy and personal space. Photography is usually prohibited, and many events have designated monitors or guardians to help guests feel comfortable.

Remember, you’re entering an established community. Take dress codes, entry requirements and etiquette seriously, and read the organiser’s guidelines before attending.

Find out about all Sensual Events & Workshops like Play Parties in New York City. and discover practitioners in NYC.

Related reading:

5 sex-worker-friendly photographers in NYC.

Sex-positive festivals in and around Berlin.

The ultimate guide to London’s sex parties.

London’s underground sensual bars

Sex Culture at Burning Man

Paris’s new wave cabaret scene.

Featured photo: Snctm