What Happens During a Sex Toy Consultation

Ever added a sex toy to your online basket, stared at it for what felt like forever, and then closed the tab? 

You’re not alone. 

Choosing the right sex toy can feel strangely overwhelming. With endless options, mixed reviews and no personalised guidance, many people are left second-guessing their choices or abandoning the idea altogether. 

Think of it like shopping for skincare when you’re not even sure of your skin type, confusing, time-consuming and often a bit disappointing. 

That’s exactly why I offer sex toy consultations, to help take the stress, shame and guesswork out of something that’s meant to be fun and empowering.

 

Who Am I?

Hi, I’m Amari. I’m a certified sex coach, clinical sexologist and accredited sex and relationship educator. My work is rooted in the belief that everyone deserves access to shame-free, inclusive and practical sex education, including guidance on how to explore pleasure in ways that feel right for them. 

Through my one-to-one sex toy consultations, I help individuals and couples find tools that truly suit their needs, bodies and desires. These sessions aren’t salesy or awkward. They’re safe, affirming and full of real-world, practical advice that you can actually use.

 

What Is a Sex Toy Consultation?

A sex toy consultation is a private online session designed to help you explore sexual wellness products that are right for you. In our 60-90 minute session, we chat about your needs, goals, boundaries and experiences, or lack thereof.

There’s no pressure to come in with knowledge or previous experience. Whether you’re a complete beginner or someone who already owns toys but isn’t sure how to use them confidently, I meet you where you are. 

Together, we look at the kinds of stimulation you enjoy or are curious about, your comfort levels and any specific physical, emotional or relational factors that might impact your choices. From there, I recommend products, accessories and approaches that align with your unique needs. 

There’s no one-size-fits-all advice here, it’s completely tailored to you.

 

Why Might You Need a Consultation?

There are a lot of myths and misconceptions when it comes to sex toys.

People often feel like they should just know what to buy or how to use it, even though we’re rarely taught anything about pleasure, anatomy or sexual confidence in school, let alone how to choose a vibrator or lube.

So it’s no wonder that so many people end up buying toys that aren’t suited to their anatomy, choosing products that feel intimidating or confusing to use, blaming themselves when they don’t feel satisfied or avoiding toys altogether because they don’t know where to start. 

Even when someone finds the right toy, they might not be using it in a way that actually works for their body, and again, that’s not their fault. It’s a result of a lack of education and support.

A consultation can help you shift from trial-and-error to truly understanding your body and pleasure. You wouldn’t expect to master a recipe without instructions, so why expect yourself to intuitively know how to use a toy with zero guidance?

 

Who Are These Sessions For?

These sessions are for anyone interested in exploring pleasure with more confidence and clarity. That includes people new to sex toys, individuals looking to better understand their own desires, couples wanting to enhance intimacy or break out of routines, and anyone feeling stuck, disconnected or unsure where to start. 

You might already own toys but don’t feel like you’re using them correctly. 

Or perhaps you’ve never purchased one but are curious and want expert advice before diving in. 

Whatever your starting point, this space is for you.

 

Solo Pleasure or Shared Intimacy

One of the most beautiful things about sex toys is their versatility. They can help you connect more deeply with yourself or with a partner. If you’re exploring solo pleasure, we might look at finding toys that suit your anatomy and stimulation preferences, breaking through shame or guilt around self-pleasure, building confidence and body awareness or exploring new sensations in a safe, pressure-free way.

If you’re in a relationship, we might focus on introducing toys into partnered sex, communicating needs and desires more openly, reigniting intimacy after a lull or routine or using toys to support emotional and physical closeness, not replace it.

Toys aren’t about fixing anything. They’re tools, and when used intentionally, they can create space for discovery, play and deeper connection.

 

Maybe You’ve Already Bought Toys But Something Feels Off

“I have toys, but I’m not sure I’m using them right.”

That’s completely normal. It’s often not about the product itself, but rather how it’s being used, what it’s being paired with or how it fits into your routine or relationship. For example, maybe you’ve used a wand only externally, not realising how versatile it can be for partnered play.

You might have a G-spot toy that feels awkward, but a simple change in position could transform the experience. Or you’ve never used lube with your toy and had no idea how much it could improve sensation and comfort. These sessions give you the confidence and clarity to actually enjoy the tools you’ve invested in, or to avoid wasting money on things that aren’t suited to you in the first place.

 

What Happens in the Session?

The consultation starts with a relaxed, friendly chat. No scripts, no pressure. just a real conversation about what’s brought you here and what you’re hoping to get from the session.

We’ll explore what you’re curious about, any struggles or questions you’ve had with toys or pleasure, your boundaries, comfort levels and communication needs, and specific goals you’d like to work towards.

From there, I’ll guide you through a range of product recommendations tailored to your anatomy, preferences and values. I also explain how and why they might work for you, in plain language, with no jargon or assumptions.

I cover things like what materials are body-safe and how to tell the difference, how to clean and care for your toys properly, which lubricants are best for different situations, and where to buy from inclusive, reliable retailers.

This isn’t just a shopping list. It’s a collaborative space where you can ask questions, explore ideas and feel empowered to take your pleasure seriously.

 

What Happens After the Call?

The support doesn’t end when the video call does. After your session, you’ll receive seven days of email follow-up. This means you can ask follow-up questions, share updates or concerns and get help troubleshooting anything you’re unsure about. 

A sex toy consultation is about so much more than picking something to add to your drawer. It’s about tuning into what you really want. It’s about unlearning shame and pressure.

It’s about building confidence and joy on your own terms. Whether you’re starting from scratch or looking to go deeper in your journey, these sessions offer support, education and encouragement in a space that feels safe and welcoming.

Pleasure is not a luxury. It’s a part of your overall wellbeing and you deserve to explore it with curiosity, care and confidence. I’m here when you’re ready.

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