Talking about intimacy can feel incredibly vulnerable, but that’s because it’s a conversation most of us were never taught how to have. We learn about careers, finances, yet very few of us are shown how to talk openly about sex, desire or what we feel we need in our relationships.
It’s a skill, not something you’re expected to know. So if sitting down for a serious conversation feels too daunting, start smaller. One way could be to share an article, podcast, meme, or even a piece of advice you’ve seen on Instagram to help take some of the pressure off.
You might say, “I saw this, and it made me think of us. What do you think?” Sometimes it’s easier to talk about someone else’s experience before sharing your own.
Another key tip is that when you do talk, try to focus on curiosity rather than criticism. Use “I” statements, such as “I’d love for us to feel closer,” or “I miss feeling physically connected to you,” rather than placing blame on each other.