Sexological bodywork in New York: meet Barry Carl

How would you describe yourself in three words?

Kind. Compassionate. Sensual.

Tell us more about yourself…

I believe and practice the healing power of pleasure. My work is a synergistic blend of elements, techniques, and tools garnered from decades of training in different disciplines and extensive experience with hundreds of clients.

I am a clinician, but my approach is not clinical. It is deeply rooted in care and support for each unique individual.

My sessions are contoured to the needs of the client, so it is hard to describe a ‘typical’ session since no two are alike.

What is consistent is my focus, presence, non-judgmental approach, and commitment to support the expansion and growth of each client.

What services do you offer on Sensuali?

I am currently offering sexological bodywork sessions, 2- and 4-handed erotic massage, kink, BDSM, and D/s sessions, erotic massage and intimacy coaching for couples and individuals. I also offer what I call augmented sessions, which combine psychedelics with erotic work.

What turns you on?

I am an advocate of ‘the turned on life’. Many things turn me on in different ways, and not just erotically. I am turned on by erotic energy, music, nature, water, food for the body and the spirit, skilled touch, hot conversation, ideas, embodied wisdom, honesty, straightforward communication, olfactory stimulation, and clients who are committed to the work and to their own growth.

It turns me on to see people expand into their fullest expression of self. To see clients drop deeply into their own bodies and slowly learn to trust their own inner guidance and more importantly to learn to trust the healing power of pleasure in their lives is a huge turn on for me.

What was your journey into this world?

I think that I came into this life with one foot already in this world.

From an early age I was able to ‘see’ energy, so working with bodies felt like second nature from the beginning.

I was also erotically aware at an early age, and fascinated with the human body.

I had an uncle who was a surgeon and I used to spend hours in his library, reading medical texts, absorbing anatomy and physiology. I was also fascinated from my earliest days by the realm of the erotic, a lively curiosity that I still possess. I trained in various therapeutic massage techniques, and began doing erotic bodywork in my 20’s.

What do the first 60 minutes of your day look like?

The day begins with a short gratitude ritual, tea, and a meditative practice.

Why do you do what you do?

I feel deeply called to my work. I find it deeply satisfying to support others in their connection, reconnection, exploration, and expansion in their personal growth, especially in their reclamation of their bodies, their autonomy, and their pleasure, and the deepening of their personal connection to Eros.

Most of my clients are women, and helping them to realize their absolutely amazing erotic potential is deeply gratifying. That often includes helping them learn to love and accept their bodies and the stunning array of sensation that is available to them.

What is an unexpected pleasure you discovered in your work?

I work with a broad spectrum of clients who range in age from 23-93! My oldest client to date, who was 93 when we worked together, taught me that we are indeed sexual beings all our lives, and that giving up erotic activity is a choice, not an inevitability. Learning that lesson was a deep and unexpected pleasure, and the experience altered me significantly.

I am affected and changed and informed by every session I give, and in ways that are impossible to predict.

I am always deeply honored by the trust of my clients, and often witnessing their courage, strength, and joy is an unexpected delight.

What should more people know about your work?

This work has been around for at least 2500 years. Its value was recognized and celebrated by the ancient Greeks. It isn’t some new sort of modality. In its more recent iteration, its roots can be traced back to the 20th century work of Wilhelm Reich, the father of somatic therapy.

It is work that is sorely needed by many, and making it available and accessible is a big part of my mission in life.

Happy bodies tend to be healthier than unhappy bodies, and this is a crucial element of self-care that many people either ignore or are unaware of.

In addition, a large number of people lose the connection to their bodies at some point in their lives, either from illness, dysregulation, trauma, or shame-based indoctrination, and it is established science that happy bodies produce all the hormones and chemicals that the body needs in order to stay healthy and happy.

It’s been my experience that bodies whose erotic needs are taken care of need fewer prescription medicines, and they stay healthy longer.

What’s your superpower?

Seeing a person’s erotic potential and helping them fulfill it

We love vices. What’s yours?

Oh if I only had a single vice! That would be simple. I live a rather kinky lifestyle, so that’s a plethora of vices under a single umbrella. I love motorcycles and spend a good chunk of my time in the wind…is that a vice or a simple pleasure or both?

I love giving impact sessions combined with restraints, teaching clients to ejaculate, helping them learn to become orgasmic or multiorgasmic, and helping them find their voices and their pleasure, but I’m not at all sure those are vices either.

Who are your sensual inspirations?

Caffyn Jesse, Pamela Madsen

Closing thoughts?

Oh my, there’s so much more to say about this but I don’t want to overwhelm anyone with verbiage. I’d say this; There is a huge difference between reading a menu and eating the food.